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School of Schlock

A podcast for B-movie discussion. A new film is discussed on the 1st and 15th of every month.
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School of Schlock
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Now displaying: Category: sci-fi
Nov 1, 2019

A giant man is stomping around the desert, and his only weakness...is bread. Join Tom, Ryan, and special guest Aran for an enormously entertaining episode, with high-level discussion of Bert I. Gordon films, and a gargantuan amount of wordplay and puns. We also chat about 60-foot Force ghosts, methamphetamine, grade-school height differences, and raccoons and disguise! It's our discussion of War of the Colossal Beast!

Episode Time Stamps:

0:06:45 - Back-of-the-box Summary

0:11:50 - Background

0:24:17 - Notable Scenes

0:37:32 - The Good

0:51:40 - The Bad

1:14:27 - The Ugly

Sep 15, 2019

Was every science fiction space film after 1977 a derivative of Star Wars? Clearly not, because this film is derivative of both Star Wars and Star Trek! Join Tom and Ryan as they slog through this sci-fi drudgery and discuss such important topics as hack directors, Young Frankenstein references, and plot holes the size of black holes! Also they sing part of the Isley Brothers' classic song "Shout." It's our review of War of the Robots!

 

Time stamps:

0:02:55 - Background

0:18:25 - Film Summary

0:41:07 - The Good

0:45:25 - The Bad

0:59:20 - The Ugly

1:13:22 - Improvements

Aug 15, 2019

More 1950's aliens are here to try their hand (claw?) at conquering the world. This time we watch as a giant pickle with a grumpy face turns off all energy and sends tortilla bats to take over people's minds! Along the way we talk about the human embodiment of The Bad, strong character choices for women, and overthrowing the government by starting in suburban California. Turn on your favorite Venutian radio and listen to our review of It Conquered the World!

 

Time stamps:

0:03:45 - Background

0:24:20 - Film Summary

0:44:40 - The Good

0:53:20 - The Bad

1:09:20 - The Ugly

1:19:35 - Improvements

Jul 1, 2019

A group of scientists have been gathered in a secret laboratory to research atomic energy...but to what end? Fans of Mystery Science Theater may recall the sci-fi film used for MST3K: The Movie, and Tom and Ryan prove that they sure know their MST quotes! Join us as we discuss good 50's special effects vs. bad 50's special effects, ear-piercing sounds, and the worst kinds of philosophical responses you can give. It's our review of This Island Earth!

 

Time stamps:

0:05:05 - Background

0:21:24 - Film Summary

0:50:33 - The Good

0:59:56 - The Bad

1:09:58 - The Ugly

1:20:02 - Improvements

Jun 1, 2019

Everyone and loves Godzilla, but what about his hard-shelled cousin, Gamera? This giant turtle is the savior of Japan and a friend to all children! Tom and Ryan watch as he fights a giant knife-headed monster; along the way there is discussion about kaiju gymnastics, the Church of Gamera, and exactly how much monster fighting should be a move about monsters fighting. The Gamera Theme will live on in your heart when you listen to our review of Gamera vs. Guiron!

 

Time stamps:

0:03:22 - Background

0:20:52 - Film Summary

0:44:43 - The Good

0:49:10 - The Bad

0:54:48 - The Ugly

1:06:00 - Improvements

May 3, 2019

What would happen if you remade the film Independence Day, but left out all of the action and made the aliens look like goofy bug-eyed humans? Obviously you would get this movie, as Tom and Ryan quickly discover! Join them as they talk about oversized wildlife, the influence of Biography, and the sin of omission. Prepare yourself to be abducted by the Killers from Space!

Mar 15, 2019

Post-apocalyptic worlds are often scary, dangerous, and wild places. But what if you could visit a post-apocalypse that took place entirely in a verdant Canadian park? Why, then you'd have poutine, all-dressed chips, and this week's movie! Join Tom and Ryan as they chat about a polite and gentle end-times, review the effectiveness of cloning, and take a long look at the commodification of women in our review of Survival Earth!

 

Time stamps:

0:03:38 - Background

0:15:35 - Film Summary

0:38:38 - The Good

0:42:35 - The Bad

0:53:10 - The Ugly

1:03:30 - Improvements

Feb 1, 2019

Polar Vortex have you on ice? Need to warm up a little? Then come to the island where the temperature's hot and the aliens are gloopy! Join Tom and Ryan as they review a strange little 60s sci-fi horror film with some of the biggest names in British acting! Along the way we'll discuss infidelity, solving problems by blowing them up, and, of course, radioactive cauliflower. Things are heating up as we review Island of the Burning Damned!

 

Time stamps:

0:04:15 - Background

0:30:45 - Film Summary

0:56:00 - The Good

1:03:32 - The Bad

1:11:55 - The Ugly

1:23:28 - Improvements

Jan 16, 2019

Cryogenic freezing has been a sci-fi staple for a while, and it's easy to see why. Someone from our time is frozen and wakes up in the distant future of...one day later. And that's about all that happens in the 60s soap opera snoozer dressed up like a sci-fi film! Join Tom and Ryan as they watch scientific lectures, forget about the bullet in the chamber, and make a series of temperature-based puns! This isn't just Netflix and chill, this is Frozen Alive!

Time stamps:

0:04:55 - Background

0:21:05 - Film Summary

0:45:40 - The Good

1:00:44 - The Bad

1:16:35 - The Ugly

1:26:05 - Improvements

Nov 1, 2018

An icy tundra. A horrible monster. Paranoia and fraying relationships. No, it's not The Thing, no matter how much we wish it was! A giant beast is prowling the Swedish hills, and no one knows how to stop it. Tom and Ryan watch as the film wanders from genre to genre; in the meantime, they discuss American re-cuts, filming a twenty-foot-tall monster, fake Frank Sinatra, and the absence of John Carradine. It's our review of Terror in the Midnight Sun!

 

Time stamps:

0:03:50 - Background

0:19:25 - Film Summary

0:36:15 - The Good

0:47:35 - The Bad

0:57:30 - The Ugly

1:08:55 - Improvements

Jul 1, 2018

There are a small handful of B movies that can claim a real cult following and true cinematic infamy. Perhaps the greatest and worst of all of these is none other than Plan 9 From Outer Space. Join Tom and Ryan as they discuss one of the most famously terrible movies of all time for their special 50th episode! You'll hear all about the future, the tragic end of Ed Wood, the future, beating off aliens, and the future! All this and more in our review of Plan 9 From Outer Space!

Time stamps:

0:03:10 - Background

0:38:25 - Film Summary

1:08:25 - The Good

1:12:10 - The Bad

1:28:06 - The Ugly

1:32:04 - Improvements

May 15, 2018

Four scientists have crash on Mars and have to survive the barren alien landscape, but if you come to this film expecting The Martian, just click your heels three times and go home! We watch this plodding movie where nothing happens while discussing why nothing happens; we also talk about Martian lectures, a cabal of vending machine operators, and the use of this film as a safe, non-addictive sleeping aid. There's no place like home, and there truly is no movie quite like The Wizard of Mars!

 

Time stamps:

0:04:35 - Film Summary

0:13:20 - Background

0:28:23 - The Good & The Bad (Mostly the Bad)

0:46:35 - The Ugly

1:05:30 - Improvements

May 2, 2018

Adorable, furry parasites from parts unknown are out to conquer the human race via mind control, and Tom and Ryan have to watch this poorly-plotted piece of sci-fi dreck to find out how to stop them! Along the way they discover a missing group of scientists, find out how to make monsters out of pipe cleaners, and uncover a role played by a future titan of science fiction cinema. You don't need to spend forever searching for clues; just listen to our review of The Brain Eaters!

Time stamps:

0:03:23 - Film Summary

0:31:05 - Background

0:51:58 - The Good

0:59:18 - The Bad

1:11:52 - The Ugly

1:27:10 - Improvements

Feb 15, 2018

Buck Rogers in the 25th century! If that's a phrase you recognize, then you're the target market for this 1953 recut of a bunch of 1930s sci-fi serials. Join Tom and Ryan as they watch Olympians, ponder round-trip flights to Saturn, and encounter the person who may be the most prolific actor in the history of Hollywood! So put down that Encyclopedia of Dirigible Accidents and enjoy this review of Planet Outlaws!

 

Time Stamps:

0:05:00 - Film Summary

0:21:35 - Background

0:43:20 - The Good

0:49:30 - The Bad

1:00:05 - The Ugly

1:16:20 - Improving the Film

Feb 1, 2018

When women a group of women are irradiated and have their DNA mixed with that of bees, what is it that they want? Apparently the answer is lots of sex! Join Tom and Ryan as they are subjected to a terrible softcore sci-fi film that prompts discussions about press conferences, bad lighting, and Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. Try as you might, you won't soon forget Invasion of the Bee Girls!

Episode Time Stamps:

0:03:39 - Plot Summary

0:33:35 - Background

0:55:05 - The Good

0:59:13 - The Bad

1:09:10 - The Ugly

1:31:03 - Improvements

Sep 15, 2017

What do you do when a monster from space is threatening Japan? Why, you send in Tom, Ryan, and the most adorable kaiju you can find to take care of it! We review this family-friendly, super 70s Japanese monster film, and along the way get into discussions about theme songs, marvel at the artistic might of Toho, and put on our worst Boston accentsfor a boardroom presentation. Ride along with us on our exploding aerobikes as we review Daigoro vs Goliath!

Episode Time Stamps

0:03:00 - Film Summary

0:34:05 - Film Background

0:47:46 - The Good

0:51:58 - The Bad

0:58:20 - The Ugly

1:07:42 - Improving the Film

Jun 2, 2017
A mirror-wearing monster from the future is on the loose in central Florida! Or at least it is for the last 15 minutes of this 1958 piece of sci-fi dreck. Before that, Tom and Ryan have to sit through reverse-carbon-dating, selfish scientists, air-headed secretaries, peeping toms, and tons of wasted potential in Terror from the Year 5000! At least Tom learns a little something about Avatar: The Last Airbender and how much Ryan loves the M. Night Shyamalan film adaptation.
 
 
Episode Time Stamps
 
0:04:35 - Film Summary
 
0:30:20 - Film Background 
 
0:49:52 - The Good
 
0:58:14 - The Bad
 
1:12:06 - The Ugly
 
1:30:30 - Improving the Film
May 15, 2017
Who do you call when earthquakes are threatening to destroy the planet? Apparently you call some bland seismologists and a whole bunch of stock footage, if this Fred F. Sears snooze-fest is to be believed. Join Tom and Ryan as they watch a film about falling rocks, women abandoning successful careers to get married, and a whole lot of Element 112. Try to contain your violent reactions as we review The Night the World Exploded!
 
 
Episode Time Stamps
 
0:03:50 - Film Summary
 
0:24:44 - Film Background 
 
0:41:51 - The Good
 
0:53:30 - The Bad
 
1:06:38 - The Ugly
 
1:20:00 - Improving the Film
May 1, 2017
The name "Sidney Pink" elicits reactions from nearly everyone; those reactions usually include "Huh?" "Who's that?" and "What are you talking about?" That's why we're on the second film in our Sidney Pink block: Journey to the Seventh Planet! Come listen to Tom and Ryan discuss one-eyed ferrets, imaginary women (and the men who love them), and of course petty, sentient brain-creatures! Join us and I'm sure you'll agree: we'll find our love somewhere beyond the seventh planet.
 
 
Episode Time Stamps
 
0:03:17 - Film Summary
 
0:25:31 - Film Background 
 
0:40:02 - The Good
 
0:44:28 - The Bad
 
1:00:15 - The Ugly
 
1:15:05 - Improving the Film
Apr 15, 2017
Icons of Danish culture include Hamlet, Hans Christian Andersen, and Soren Kierkegaard. Well finally, Tom and Ryan are happy to welcome a giant prehistoric reptile to the ranks of Danish superstardom in a 1960s monster movie that comes straight from Scandinavia! Thrill as they discuss Danish amusement parks, Dustin Hoffman, aimless scientific experiments, and the worst example of farmer-eating ever! Whether you're taking in the film, the new MST3K episode, or the smutty novelization, you're sure to enjoy Reptilicus!
 
 
Episode Time Stamps
 
0:02:47 - Film Summary
 
0:33:19 - Film Background 
 
0:58:28 - The Good
 
1:06:24 - The Bad
 
1:21:26 - The Ugly
 
1:36:31 - Improving the Film
Apr 1, 2017
A rogue pilot and a mystical lightsaber-wielding warrior team up to fight against a planet-sized, galaxy-threatening evil! No, it's not A New Hope. And no, it's not The Force Awakens. It's a film that's more like the ADD-diagnosed version of Star Wars. It's a film with omniscient characters, Southwestern robots, and David Hasselhoff. It's a film that stops the flow of time. It's...Starcrash!
 
 
Episode Time Stamps
 
0:03:00 - Film Summary
 
0:32:43 - Film Background 
 
0:58:45 - The Good
 
1:03:30 - The Bad
 
1:08:55 - The Ugly
 
1:38:31 - Improving the Film
Mar 15, 2017
When people from the 1980s get sucked into a transdimensional teleporter and wind up in another world, it's up to Tom and Ryan to watch them slowly try to escape! Will a balding warlord stand in their way? How does Battlestar Galactica relate to all of this? Would a Memento-like version of this film be better? And what about the watch??? We attempt to answer all of these questions when we discuss Prisoners of the Lost Universe!
 
 
Episode Time Stamps
 
0:03:14 - Film Summary
 
0:27:23 - Film Background 
 
0:38:50 - The Good
 
0:46:20 - The Bad
 
1:02:32 - The Ugly
 
1:20:27 - Improving the Film
Mar 1, 2017
The Earth is about to be destroyed by a doomsday machine, and it's up to a few remaining humans to go into space to escape! It's also up to Tom and Ryan to suffer through this painfully dull film. Listen in as they discuss death via airlock, interplanetary narrators, and the best way to get your grandma out of the gulag. Keep Khrushchev on speed-dial, because we're talking about The Doomsday Machine!
 
 
Episode Time Stamps
 
0:03:17 - Film Summary
 
0:23:52 - Film Background 
 
0:45:50 - The Good
 
0:50:05 - The Bad
 
1:04:10 - The Ugly
 
1:25:35 - Improving the Film
Dec 15, 2016
It's our holiday episode, so of course that means lots of Santa Claus, lots of singing children, and also lots of scheming Martians! Listen in as Tom and Ryan discuss the relative intelligence of Santa, the relevance of former Nazi scientist Dr. Werner von Braun, and whether or not Santa is a benevolent ruler of his many puppet governments. Put on your robot costumes and polar bear suits, because it's time for Santa Claus Conquers the Martians!
 
 
Episode Time Stamps
 
0:02:30 - Film Summary
 
0:18:35 - Film Background 
 
0:43:23 - The Good
 
0:56:25 - The Bad
 
1:08:33 - The Ugly
 
1:25:20 - Improving the Film
Sep 15, 2016
A giant white ball! An invisible man! A whole lot of people talking for a very long time! Tom and Ryan are here to tell you about it all, and they even find time to fit in discussions about murder-by-shot-put, drugged-out scientists, and atom-bomb-related conservational faux pas. Put down your telescopes and your chess games and come give a listen to The Cosmic Man!
 
 
Episode Time Stamps:
 
 
0:02:40 - Film Summary
 

0:34:44 - Film Background
 
 
0:51:30 - The Good
 

1:03:20 - The Bad
 

1:14:10 - The Ugly
 

1:36:31 - Improving the Film
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